commonwealth

can't we all just get along

“Those who profess to favor freedom and yet depreciate agitation are people who want crops without ploughing the ground; they want rain without thunder and lightning; they want the ocean without the roar of its many waters. The struggle may be a moral one, or it may be a physical one, or it may be both. But it must be a struggle. Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will.”

-Frederick Douglas

If this weekend was any indication, then by Frederick Douglas' estimation, we must be some freedom-loving people.  Wow.  That was something.  Regardless of where you sit on the ideological spectrum, the sight of millions of people coming together to embrace the freedom to assemble, to speak up, and to criticize their government, is a remarkable, powerful thing.  

And that was a lot of yarn.

The marches in Washington and around the world have not, of course, been met with universal support.  Humans don't like conflict.  At least not conflict we aren't sure we can win.  And we really don't conflict if it disrupts what was supposed to be a good time.  So what we've got happening now is the national equivalent of a holiday dinner that erupted into an argument.  (Occurring weeks after actual holiday dinners erupted into arguments, yeah us.)

There are two sides, and nearly everyone in the family has picked one, except for a few of the older generation who keep shushing people and passing around pie.  

There are a lot of voices calling for quiet right now.  Some, like grandma, cushion the request with reminders of loyalty and shared experience.  Others, opt to raise their own voices, attempting to accomplish in shouting and insults what they've not achieved in debate.  Neither approach is likely to be entirely successful, nor do I think they should be.

In the human experience, I don't think any family argument has ever been resolved by everyone just piping down and pretending to get along.  It only looks that way until the next time everyone's together and inevitably something happens, someone gets angry, and it all gets dragged out and fired up again.  

So let's just get it all out on the table.

We have real problems in this country, and it's going to require hard work and commitment to fix them.  It's also going to require that people with opposing views of what that work should look like, bring their best ideas and their fullest knowledge and be prepared to challenge each other.  And it should go without saying that "best ideas and fullest knowledge" are not cultivated in an environment that tolerates deception or that stifles dissent.  Ever.

Millions of people stood up last weekend and said they don't think this administration's proposals - and actions - are meeting that standard.  And there will likely be demonstrations in the future with people that like the president's proposals and have no problem with his actions.  This isn't wrong.  Good, decent, honest people can disagree.  Family members that love each other can disagree.  

So keep showing up for the dinners.  I'll bring my best ideas and you bring yours and maybe if we do it often enough we can come up with an even better idea that we both can agree on.  

And if we're really lucky, there might even be pie.

 

 

 

 

good management

Americans love to talk about our rights.  

We have a right to free speech.  We have a right to free religious practice.  We have a right to a free press.  We have a right to remain silent and a right to an attorney.  We have the right to bear arms and a right to equal treatment under the law. We may not always agree on where to draw the line when your rights bump up against mine, but we can damn well agree that we have the rights to begin with.

But what about responsibilities? Do citizens of a free and democratic republic have ANY obligations?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot over the last few weeks, as we see a fresh new crop of legislators take up office.  I believe it’s easy to forget sometimes that they’re our employees.  Oh, sure.  We like to complain that politicians get to city hall or the state capital or Congress or the White House and forget that they are supposed to be working for the people they represent.  

But…if they’re supposed to be working for us, aren't we supposed to be managing them?

If there’s one thing more politically troubling than our abysmal voter turnout in this country, its the disengagement that citizens have once election season is over.  Remarkably few Americans even know who their elected representatives are, as evidenced by the surge in “who is my congressman” Google searches any time something controversial happens.  And of those who do know (however last-minute) who’s representing them, the number that have communicated with those representatives is much, much smaller.

It’s like we went out and hired a bunch of contractors, showed them a picture of a house and said “I’d like something sort of like this.”  And then never spoke to them again.

Sure, you might have researched your elected representatives’ background and general policy positions, but that hardly answers the question of what he or she will do in every circumstance they’re presented with. You’d check your contractors too, but can you be sure they know you prefer hardwood to carpet?  No.  You have to TELL THEM.

Now, what I’m suggesting needn't be a full-time job. What I’d like you to do, is look up the phone number and email address of one of your elected officials at every level of government (local, state, and federal.)  You likely have more than one elected representative, but let’s start with picking one.  

Now, I’d like you to put that information in your phone contacts list. 

Going forward, if there’s an issue that’s come up locally or nationally that you have questions or concerns about, call them or send an email. If they do something that you support, do the same (all employees like positive feedback, but politicians LOVE IT.) You probably won’t reach them directly, but their staff will take note of it and pass it along to their boss. And they may ultimately not do what you want them to do in every case, but good managers work to develop their staff, and you should too.

 

 

 

watching the news

As part of my "I'M going to do something" resolution, I started following Fox News on Facebook (Fox News national, not a local affiliate station) in an effort to broaden the sources of the news I read and watch.  I watch very little television, so most of my news comes from print, websites, radio, and social media posts from news sources.  And in that respect, I have a lot of company.  Nationwide, an estimated 43% of Americans receive ALL or SOME of their news from social media sites.  So what news outlets choose to send out to their followers is important, because this is where media bias begins.

While I have always recognized that the tenor of news coverage varies between networks, I failed to recognize the significant variance in what stories get covered at all.  Specifically, I've started noting which news stories were not included on the Fox News Facebook page, that were covered on other major national news media sites (NPR, MSNBC, NBC, CNN,) and vice versa, and keeping a running list on my phone.  I've chosen Facebook as the comparison point as it's the largest social media platform.

While I understand that most news Facebook pages do not reflect the entirety of what their broadcasts covered every day, I've focused on the Facebook presence in order to compare apples-to-apples and for the significant sector of the "news-reach pie" that Facebook represents.

I've mentioned my "study" before on Facebook, so if you follow me there, you're probably already familiar with it.  As I began to do last week, I will be coming here regularly to update you on where I'm seeing coverage gaps.  Because everyone should have as much information available to them as possible in order to formulate their opinions on the issues facing this country. 

it's not working

I’ve tried.  Really, I have.  I have exercised hard and stretched gently.  I’ve read more books and taken more walks.  I’ve taken time for quiet reflection and I’ve talked it out.  I’ve danced and I’ve meditated.  I’ve consumed gallons of tea and bottles of wine.  I’ve been up at dawn and napped in the middle of the day.  I’ve stayed off my phone and I’ve joined hundreds of online conversations.  

I’ve followed every bit of advice.

And I’m still mad as hell.

And I’ve decided maybe anger is an underrated emotion.  We aren’t supposed to be angry.  Especially women.  Angry women are harpies.  They’re nags.  They’re bitter.  And I suppose, given free rein, anger can make you all of those things.  But in the same way that fear can cause you to either freeze up or get focused, I think anger has a flip side to it.

You have to be thinking about something in order to get angry about it.  Anger will embolden you.  It will wake you up.  It will cause you to take stock of a situation, and it can light a match that will burn through your complacency. 

Well, I’m paying attention now.  “Woke,” my daughter calls it. And what remains after every attempt I’ve made to find some peace, is the ashes of waiting for someone else to do something.  

I’M doing something now.

I’m doing something EVERY DAY to make a difference, to protect the people and places that I love.  To improve my community and my country, and to move toward a freer, more equitable world.  And no, I’m not running for office or starting a foundation or writing checks with commas in them.  There’s nothing wrong with doing those things, of course, but that’s not where I am in life.

I’m calling elected officials.  I’m sending emails.  I’m showing up at meetings.  I’m recognizing when I don't know enough about an issue and then doing some old-fashioned research at the library.  I’m diversifying my news sources so I better understand what and how issues are getting discussed.  I’m talking with my friends and family, and I’m talking to acquaintances and people I’ve never met.  

And I’ll be here.  I’ll share what I’ve learned, and maybe you can share what you've learned too.

Because if I’m going to be angry, its going to count for something.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the relativity of bruises

Estimates of physical assaults against women in the U.S. run as high as one occurrence every 9 seconds.

I’ll give you a minute to let that sink in.

“Physical assaults” does, of course, cover a wide spectrum of behavior - from simple battery to sexual assault to murder - so I suppose it’s to be expected that there would be a correspondingly high rate of occurrence.  But every nine seconds?

I was thinking about this yesterday as I read news articles about Donald Trump’s campaign manager, Corey Lewandowski, being charged with battery of a female reporter at a Trump campaign event the beginning of March in Jupiter, Florida.  As with many political stories, there was initial reporting on the incident a few weeks ago, during which Lewandowski and the Trump campaign insisted he’d never had physical contact with the woman in question, and that she was either delusional or attention-seeking in claiming that he did, and then relative quiet.

I’m really not interested in rehashing the coverage of Lewandowski’s charges, or the frame-by-frame breakdown of the surveillance video released by the Jupiter Police Department to substantiate their charge of battery.  Because, ultimately, it’s for a court to decide whether his contact with her reaches the legal standard of simple battery.  

What is more important to me, and what I find more disturbing than the facts of the case, is the degree to which people commenting on the news reports were willing to acknowledge that contact occurred, but were assigning their own standard as to whether the contact in question was sufficient to have offended the reporter or to have resulted in criminal charges.  Arguing, for example, “She’s making a big deal out of nothing.  I saw the photo of the bruises on her arm and they really weren’t that dark.”

And a lot of these commenters were women.

So the questions I have today are, when are bruises sufficiently dark that they warrant having a big deal made out of them?  Is there some sort of “bruise shading chart” that one should refer to when determining whether someone has acted inappropriately or even criminally toward you? Are bruises even necessary to know that someone has crossed a line, or is feeling unsafe or threatened as a result of contact enough? 

Because, here’s the thing.  Most women who are the victims of physical assaults know their assailant.  And more often than not, they’ll tell you that the assaults didn’t start with getting pushed down the stairs or punched in the face or having gasoline poured on them.  They’ll say it started with getting pushed back in the sofa cushions during an argument.  Having their phone ripped out of their hand and thrown across the room.  Having their arm grabbed as they walked out the door.  

Now, please understand, I’m not saying Corey Lewandowski abuses women.  He’s only the latest headline, and the latest debate over where the line gets drawn.  

What I AM saying, is that women are physically assaulted in this country at an appalling rate.  And some of the reason for that is that we, as a society, have been willing to leave open the possibility that maybe the bruises aren't dark enough.

 

on raincoats and elections

I’ve been avoiding this space.  It started the end of January when a planned post about sewing pajama pants for Patrick kept getting pushed back as I made one mistake after another sewing something I’ve made at least a dozen times before.  And by the time I finally finished the pajamas, all interest in writing, photographing, or even thinking about them had evaporated.

Closely followed by my motivation to write about anything at all.

This happens from time to time.  

A lot of writers use writing to process the world around them.  It’s a sort of therapy to lay out what’s in their heart or minds, organize it into paragraphs and then let it go.  For them, writing can then start from a place of internal messiness, and end in something (hopefully) coherent. And that works for them.

Writing doesn’t work that way for me.

I prefer not to speak until I’ve thought through both what I’m going to say and what might be said in reply.  In the same way, I don’t write until I’ve thought through what I want to say and how I’m going to say it.  When this process is working, writing then becomes more like taking dictation, rather than leading an exploration.  Which is fine also, except it makes starting from a place of messiness a little difficult.

And boy-howdy are things messy.

Now, before you get worried, let me reassure you, I’m fine, Mr. Commonwealth is fine, the kids are fine, as are extended family and friends.  “Messy” is just the nicest way I could come up with to say that this election and the tone of public discourse in this country right now is making me crazy.

And I’m sure it's making you crazy too.  As a matter of fact, I’m probably contributing to your crazy if you’ve been following my Facebook feed.  Part of me feels like I should apologize for that, but truthfully, it’s the only thing keeping me from banging on people’s windows and asking why they aren’t freaking out too.

What’s making us all crazy, of course, is the knowledge that we don't know what will happen in November, and we actually have very little control over it.  We can vote.  We can try talking to people.  We can register voters, and pound yard signs, and write checks, but there are over 146 million registered voters in this country, so each of us is a small cog in a very big system.  

And I don’t know about you, but I don't much care for feeling so insignificant.

If you can already see the irony in this, then you’re a few weeks ahead of me.

Because it’s taken me a while to make peace (again) with the realization that of course we’re a small part of a much bigger system.  We always have been.  It didn’t start with primary season, it’s the way the universe is set up.  You only have to go outside to recognize that there’s a whole big world going on all around us every day that we have little to no control over.  Rain falls, rivers flow, bugs crawl, birds fly, the sun rises and sets.  All without us doing anything.  

And while I like to think things might run a little smoother around here if the weather would be more inclined to follow my suggestions, at the end of the day, I have to settle for putting on a raincoat.  Sometimes that’s all you can do.  And it might not seem like much, but when I’m standing in a downpour, it’s what keeps me warm and dry until I can get inside by a fire.

So I say, vote.  Keep talking to people.  Keep registering voters and pounding the yard signs.  It might not feel like much, but it’s what we can all do for now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Simple Gifts :: January edition

Inspired from the Shaker hymn Simple Gifts, written by Shaker Elder Joseph Brackett, Jr. in 1848:

‘Tis the gift to be simple

‘tis the gift to be free,

‘tis the gift to come down where you ought to be,

And when we find ourselves in the place just right,

It will be in the valley of love and delight.

about Alice and seasonal eating

One of my Christmas presents from Mr. Commonwealth was tickets to see an interview with Alice Waters, chef-owner of the award-winning Chez Panisse restaurant in Berkeley, cookbook author, and founder of the food-education program, The Edible Schoolyard, for which she was recently awarded the National Medal of Humanities. For over 40 years, Waters has been advocating a food philosophy based on sustainability, intention, and seasonality, forcefully arguing that a diet centered around fresh, local foods is both better for the environment and better for the body.  

Her restaurant has been described as an incubator for a whole generation of chefs that have gone on to helm their own internationally-renowned restaurants, and generated renewed interest in farmers markets and local foodsheds all over the country.  I've been reading about Alice Waters for probably 25 years, and enjoying a meal at Chez Panisse is on my personal bucket list, so I was really excited to hear first-hand how her food philosophy developed, and about her efforts to introduce school children to the pleasures of growing, cooking, and eating good food.

And since the evening fell during a weeks-long stretch of gray, rainy weather, I was looking forward to getting some inspiration for my own winter kitchen.

Like many professional and novice chefs, her interest in food began with a memorable meal.  In Ms. Waters' case, it all started with a simple bowl of soup enjoyed as an exchange student in mid-60's France.  Post-war France had escaped the large-scale industrialization and commoditization of food production that began in the U.S. during WWII and has largely continued, unabated.  As a junior in college, Ms. Waters' tastebuds already recognized a significant difference between the raw ingredients and meals available and prepared in France, and what was showing up at American markets, restaurants, and increasingly, home dinner tables.  So while her restaurant career began with an effort to get paid for the meals she started cooking for an expanding circle of friends, her interest in and passion for fresh ingredients began much earlier.

As a restauranteur, she set about sourcing the best, freshest, and most responsibly-grown food that she could find.  Surprisingly, although northern California has a climate suitable for growing something year-round, her options in the early-70's were pretty limited.  She finally resolved to draw a circle on a map representing an hour's drive from the restaurant, and to visit all the organic farms within that circumference.  At the time, that list comprised 7 farms.  That today the circle would likely include more than 10 times as many, is a testament to her determination and the support and cooperation of her local farmers.  And she is effusive in her praise of both those first, tenacious farmers that the restaurant partnered with - some of whom continue to supply Chez Panisse - and their worthy successors.  In her view, "there should be fewer famous chefs and more famous farmers."

The Edible Schoolyard program evolved from a mother's honest concern about her daughter's school lunches, and the reliance of low-income families on highly-processed, industrialized food.  What started with a garden and outdoor kitchen replacing a school's buckled asphalt playground and graffiti-scarred utility shed, has grown into a national program using the growing, harvesting and preparing of food to teach lessons in virtually every school subject.  Schools that participate in The Edible Schoolyard program are provided curriculum guides, growing instructions, resource lists, and access to a growing network of educators and food activists determined to reclaim their communities' environmental and physical health one seed at a time.  

One of the more interesting aspects of the interview was a discussion about how Americans view eating and food, in general.  Not surprisingly, in addition to advocating for sourcing and cooking food intentionally, Ms. Waters advocates eating intentionally as well.  For her, food should be prepared and consumed with thought and pleasure, with none of the "good" and "bad" associations Americans tend to burden it with.  And it absolutely shouldn't be eaten from a paper bag behind the wheel of a car - at least not as a regular practice.  To her view,  fast, cheap, and easy food, easily leads to an expectation of fast, cheap, and easy everything. 

The Edible Schoolyard program incorporates this same idea of eating intentionally, as well. Schools that participate in the program are encouraged to incorporate dining areas into their outdoor classrooms, so that students may sit down together to enjoy the meals they produce.  It was this shared meal experience that Ms. Waters offered as being one of the most surprising parts of launching the program.  She described the first few meals as being very quiet and seeming uncomfortable for the students.  After a few days, one of the teachers hit on the problem: students had so little experience in shared meals, they didn't know what to say to each other when they sat down together.  While that hurdle was easily cleared with the creation of "question" or "topic" cards left at each student's place, it served as a powerful demonstration of the gap between the ideal of meals nurturing more than just the body, and the day-to-day existence of America's families.

So what does all of this mean for me?  

As my children get older and more involved in activities with school and their friends, it admittedly can get difficult to get everyone to the dining table at the same time.  But I agree with Ms. Waters, that this is a worthwhile effort.  However, nothing says you have to sit down together at home, so maybe picnics become more commonplace, or we eat together in shifts, even if that means that occasionally what everyone's eating is take-out.  When we do eat at home, I guard that time from the intrusion of screens or phones, try to set a nice table, light some candles, and turn on some music we all like.  Anything to distinguish that time as being for rest, pleasure, and nourishment.

In the kitchen, it's a constant effort to evaluate what we're eating, where it came from, and how it was produced.  But I don't honestly find this to be particularly time-consuming, as seasonality and availability are just additional factors to be incorporated each week when I plan our menu.  And frankly, I enjoy thinking about food. I enjoy eating it too, so I don't mind spending some time to consider what I want to cook and where I can find the best-tasting, most-affordable ingredients.  And while this is certainly made easier by living in a temperate climate, it's possible to eat seasonally, and as locally as possible, anywhere.  It might just require trying new ingredients and recipes, and going off your beaten path.  But the rewards can be delicious.

In honor of eating seasonally, I've rounded up a few recipes highlighting ingredients that are likely available in abundance - and at more affordable prices - this time of year.  These are things I either make myself or have on my list to try over the next few weeks.  If you try one of the recipes, please let me know what you thought of it.  And if you have any other seasonal favorites, I encourage you to share them!

Citrus: lemon curd, herb and citrus oven-roasted chicken

Winter squash and potatoes: roasted garlic-parmesan acorn squash, lentil-vegetable curry with sweet potatoes

Greens: massaged kale salad, green smoothies

If you're looking for more information and inspiration for eating seasonally, locally, and with intention, I encourage you to check out the website for the Edible Schoolyard.  Any of Alice Waters' cookbooks provide wonderful guidance and inspiration, and Barbara Kingsolvers' Animal, Vegetable, Miracle is one that I pick up over and over again.

 

 

 

around here (mid-January)

Around here, I am...

thinking about :: how much more rain we will get (over 24 inches in the last 3 weeks!)

thankful for :: the power staying on (knocks wood)

wearing ::  black sweater dress, charcoal cable-knit tights, black suede boots, silver cuff bracelet and dangly earrings

anticipating :: an evening out with Mr. Commonwealth

eating :: homemade cinnamon-raisin toast

drinking :: Good Earth's sweet & spicy herbal tea with honey

going :: to pick the kids up from school, pick up my CSA box, and meet Mr. Commonwealth after work

reading ::  Touchstone by Laurie R. King

hearing ::  rain (heavy) on the roof

 

a thrifted DIY planner

It's the same story every year.  

I know I need a paper planner.  I know how I want to use the planner and how it has to be organized.  I know what size is most convenient and how much I want to spend (very little.)

And every year around the end of October, the hunt commences for the perfect planner.

I made my own planner a few years ago, and while the organization was what I wanted, it ultimately was a little unwieldy and, admittedly, time-consuming to make.  But after once again failing to find a pre-made planner that had everything I wanted, I resolved to make my own again, but with a twist.

You see, for the last year or so, articles and photographs of creative planners have been popping up in my Pinterest and Instagram feeds.  Some of the planners out there are just gorgeous - each page like a small piece of mixed-media art, with stickers and journaling cards and lots of color and tags and pockets and all kinds of tchotchkes sticking out of or dangling from beautiful leather-bound binders.  

They're all so pretty.  And I wanted a little bit of pretty too.

But then I started calculating what the leather planner and the custom inserts and all the embellishments were going to cost me, and...

...I decided to walk toward the light.

Because, while those planners are really beautiful, they aren't really what I need.  I need something I can write in and cross out and draw arrows and circle things and generally, MESS UP.  And the prettier the planner was, the less room I had to do that, and the more constricting it began to feel.  So this is what I did instead.

I kept the idea of a leather-bound book, as it could be the size I needed and would be plenty durable.  After looking online for day planners (wow, some of those can be expensive!) I decided to see if I could find one at the thrift store instead.  As people have converted to digital calendars, things like old Day Timers and Filofax planners often end up getting donated.  After a quick trip to my local thrift store, I had what I needed: a burgundy Day Runner, and two black Franklin Covey planners.  All three are leather with zip closures, and take A5-size inserts (roughly 5.5"x8.5"), with the Franklin Coveys having 7 rings and the Day Runner, 3 rings.  

While I could always punch holes in my inserts using a single hole-punch, I knew it would be faster and easier to find hole punches that were either designed for those styles of planners, or that could be adjusted.  Sure enough, a trip to a new-to-me thrift store yielded just what I needed.

Total cost for 3 planners, a 7-hole punch, and an adjustable 3-hole punch: less than $10.

I decided to use the larger of the two Franklin Covey planners for my daily planner (brain).  This is where I plan my week and block out my daily calendar.  I also use it to keep track of general housekeeping tasks and to capture important paperwork.  The other two planners will be used for blog planning and tracking home and garden projects.  But "the brain" needed to be functional for the first of the year when my old planner was finished, so I worked on that one first.  

In November, I drafted inserts that would be used for weekly planning and daily DIY lists, and tested them out for a few weeks.  I found that while I wanted to be able to see my week's appointments or most-important-things on one page, I also needed space to capture a weekly to-do list for chores or other activities, and additional room for meal planning.  So the weekly planning page was refined accordingly.  The daily pages were designed to capture both lists and time blocking for appointments and to help with planning my day (I prefer to organize tasks into "chunks" of time as I get more done that way.)  All of the inserts are word processing documents, printed two per letter-size sheet, and cut down to A5.  

For the monthly calendar, I downloaded a free, blank calendar page from here, and accordion-folded it to A5 size. This is where I record things like birthdays, holidays and vacations. I also included a "Goals and Notes" sheet after each monthly sheet for long-term planning and memory-keeping.

Without a doubt, the best part of designing and printing my own inserts is that I could design the planner for writing on the right-hand side only.  No more banging into the binder rings when I'm writing in my planner (lifelong pet peeve.)  It seems like such a small thing, but I like it sooooo much better.  Also, while I'm still experimenting with the style and weight of paper that I prefer for this planner, I do find that a 24lb paper designed for high-color printing is preferable to regular copy paper to prevent bleed-through from my favorite pens.

Many of the planners I liked on Instagram and Pinterest make heavy use of the pockets on the inside of the leather covers to store planning supplies and other accessories.  I've tucked some washi tape and stickers in the pockets, as well as some page flags and mini-binder clips, but I find that I don't use a lot of embellishments in this planner.  Since it's mostly to help keep me focused and productive, I find it preferable to keep the pages relatively bare, and only occasionally add some inspiring quotes or color. 

Where I have embraced color is in designing the dividers.  I used some of my favorite scrapbook papers to add a touch of "pretty" and laminated them for durability.  I used my labelmaker to label the 4 sections in the planner, and applied the labels after laminating so that they can be removed and re-labeled if I find I want to reorganize the planner at a later date.

I spend about an hour each Sunday planning my week.  At the beginning of the month, I print the daily planning sheets for that month and fill them out along with the 4 weekly planning pages.  Having a planner designed with just what I need - no more, no less - feels like such a luxury.  And knowing that I was able to do it at a fraction of the cost for a new, not-perfect-for-me planner, is even better.

If you're looking for planner resources, I have quite a few on my "Organization and Helpful" Pinterest board.  Feel free to pin anything here that you find helpful, and as always, "sharing is caring!"